Sprkus

A drunk man posing as Darth Vader attacked two founders of a Jedi church recently in the UK according to BBC News.

27-year-old Arwel Wynne Hughes, dressed in a black trash bag and cape, jumped over a garden wall, shouted “Darth Vader!” and assaulted the two men who were filming themselves fighting with lightsabers. Hughes admitted in court that he drank most of a 10-liter box of wine.

He hit one man in the head with the crutch, laughed, then hit the other in the thigh. Injuries were minor.

The Jedi victims, Barney Jones and cousin Michael, said their church had 30 members locally and thousands worldwide.

Also out of the UK, The Daily Telegraph reports that Astrology is fake.

The study, which followed and recorded the personality traits of more than 2,000 people over several decades, found no connection between personality and date of birth.

From the article:

Researchers looked at more than 100 different characteristics, including occupation, anxiety levels, marital status, aggressiveness, sociability, IQ levels and ability in art, sport, mathematics and reading - all of which astrologers claim can be gauged from birth charts.

The scientists failed to find any evidence of similarities between the “time twins”, however. They reported in the current issue of the Journal of Consciousness Studies: “The test conditions could hardly have been more conducive to success . . . but the results are uniformly negative.”

In the Congo, police have arrested 13 men suspected of shrinking or stealing other mens’ penises using black magic according to an article from Reuters.

Victims said the sorcerers simply touched them to make their penises shrink or dissapear. Some residents claim it’s an attempt to extort cash with the promise of a cure.

Kinshasa’s police chief, Jean-Dieudonne Oleko, told Reuters “I’m tempted to say it’s one huge joke.”

“But when you try to tell the victims that their penises are still there, they tell you that it’s become tiny or that they’ve become impotent,” Oleko said. “To that I tell them, ‘How do you know if you haven’t gone home and tried it’,” he said.

29-year-old Alain Kalala, who sells phone credits near a Kinshasa police station, told Reuters it’s real.

“Just yesterday here, there was a man who was a victim. We saw. What was left was tiny.”

How to spot a rich guy:

“Here mom, hang this in you living room”

Tiffany and I are SO getting one of these done.