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Van Culin video: Missed opportunities
One week after Gerrit does a face plant onto my coffee table while trying semi-successfully to remove his shirt, Van Culin performs an encore Saturday.
Gerrit’s tumble ended up causing more of a mess to our carpet than to his pride as his spill, well, spilled red candle wax on the floor. Gerrit recovered however and saved himself from ending up on the floor as well. Van Culin didn’t.
Van Culin landed completely flat on his face while trying to leave the downstairs living room. I’m not sure how it happened. It’s possible he tripped on the coffee table leg, but it’s just as possible that his legs quit working. Especially after witnessing the old-man incident that occurred at the Ci’ao bar later that night.
I was lucky enough to catch Gerrit’s fall on video, but since his shirt was tangled up over his head and he’s still at a very green point in his career, I’ve saved him the online embarrassment. I missed the opportunity to get Van Culin’s fall, which is too bad because I would have put that one online. Moreso because Van Culin had all his clothes on than the validity of his career being any less substantial.
Fast forward roughly 120 minutes from Van Culin’s fall to the Ci’ao bar. We’re are bellied up to the bar when an old man approaches us from behind. He must have been 70 plus.
“I gotta ask you guys something,” he says in a jovial way, leading me to expect some sort of joke.
Van Culin mumbled something in Drunkish at that point, to which I replied to the old man “Don’t listen to him, he’s had a few too many.” As I said that, I tapped Van Culin on the shoulder which must have tipped the scales of balance between Van Culin’s ears because his head collapsed onto the bar with a thud.
Van Culin lifted his head right back up like it was on a spring saying “Somebody just slammed my head on the table!”
“What?!?” I said.
Still facing the bar Van Culin then turns red and starts shaking like he’s about to turn into the Incredible Hulk.
“This old man just slammed my head into the bar!” Van Culin growls in an angry whisper, hoping the old man behind us doesn’t hear.
“That was me.” I said. “I tapped you on the shoulder but it wasn’t hard enough to slam your head into the bar. Dude, calm down.”
I turn back to the old man, still waiting to hear what he had to say.
“I’ll leave you two alone,” he says and walks away.
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