Sprkus

The following ads were posted to Craigslist.org in the Missed
Connections section of Columbus. I’ve replied to each with only the
line “That’s my girlfriend, asshole!” Here are the responses:

HIGH ST. - m4w - 25
Date: 2007-08-17, 7:06PM EDT

I was at the garage on the corner of High and…well I cant remember, but there was a gas station on the opposit corner, you walked by in a light blue shirt with a tan’ish colored hat and sunglasses. I dunno if you will read this. But I had one a red polo with camo shorts on. We starred at each other for a few seconds and as quick as you came you were gone again. I wanted to come up to you and ask for a name and number but I thought you might have been in a hurry. If you read this please get back to me!!! The garage I was at was HIGH ST. AUTO SALES.
    
    * Location: zanesville
    * it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 399589426

Re: HIGH ST. - m4w - 25

That’s my girlfriend, asshole!

Re:Re: HIGH ST. - m4w - 25

yo
dont even know what I’m tlaking about or what the girl looked like
exactly. is that all you have to do??? sit on the computer read past
missed conection posts and write in to people? lol

I see you at chase bank alot, I go there just to see you! - m4w
Date: 2007-08-18, 12:20AM EDT

I
have to say first of all you are the most beautiful woman I have had
the pleasure to meet. You know who you are if you are reading this and
work at chase bank. You know who I am and know my name. I am always
afraid of saying anything to you yet I want to know everything about
you.
Guess I figure if you read this and want to talk, you will write me.

    * it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 399781360

Re: I see you at chase bank alot, I go there just to see you! - m4w

That’s my girlfriend, asshole!

Re:Re: I see you at chase bank alot, I go there just to see you! - m4w

LOL!! Whatever! You wish!! You don’t even know which chase bank. Damn!

Superbad 8:45 at Rave last night - m4w
Date: 2007-08-18, 10:52AM EDT

Looking
for incredible mystery woman who went to Superbad last night at 8:45
showing at Rave at polaris. You had on blue jeans, white shirt, black
hoodie, small nose piercing, tat on your lower back. You came alone, I
admire the independence to not feel you had to go to the movies with a
date, not to mention when you walked in I couldnt help but notice you.
You sat near the top right behind the dsabled seating. If this is you
please send me a message. This is a long shot but what the hell

    * it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 399971098

Re: Superbad 8:45 at Rave last night - m4w

That’s my girlfriend, asshole!

Re:Re: Superbad 8:45 at Rave last night - m4w

well
thanks for the response you should feel lucky, but try working on your
anger issues, 1st off we didnt talk or anything so fucking relax,
secondly, and if this is even a real response, maybe you could of went
with her, still wouldnt of changed the fact that i noticed her but
whatever. Do me a favor next time save us both some time and just
ignore me. Or try growing up!

CUTE GIRL SHOPPIN AT KROGER GRANDVIEW(GARLIC) - m4w - 31
Date: 2007-08-19, 2:06PM EDT

HEY
THERE I SOW U SHOPPING U HAD A GRY TSHRIT AN TERQUAZ SHORTS ON , I
ITHINK UR CUTE I WANTED TO SAY HI AND TALK TO U BUT I DID NOT KNOW HOW
TO START , I FINSHED SHOPPING THEN I SOW BY THE AUTO CASHER AND U HAD
HARD TIME SCANNING THE GARLIC , I CAM TO U AND I TOLD THAT EVERY ITEM
HAVE A NUMBER , I REALY WANTED TO GIVE U MY PHOPE NUMBER , U FINSHED
BEFOR ME AND LEFT AND I WENT OUT I WAITED HOPING TO SEE U IN THE
PARKING LOT THEN I SOW U IN UR CAR I LOOKED AT U AND WAVED , I REALY
WANTED TO TALK TO U , I HOPE U WOULD READ THIS IF U DO , E MAIL ME MABE
WE CAN CHAT OR TALK ON THE PHONE , THEN WE CAN GO OUT FOR DINNER OR
THOMTHING
   
    * Location: GRANDVIEW
    * it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 400766508

Re: CUTE GIRL SHOPPIN AT KROGER GRANDVIEW(GARLIC) - m4w - 31

THAT’S MY GIRLFRIEND, ASSHOLE!

Re:Re: CUTE GIRL SHOPPIN AT KROGER GRANDVIEW(GARLIC) - m4w - 31

how  do i know , i think that ur the asshole

SAW YOU AT MODEST MOUSE SHOW - m4w - 25
Date: 2007-08-19, 6:46PM EDT

ME…WAS WEARING SUPER TIGHT JEANS CONVERSE ALL STARS BLACK IN COLOR BLACK FRAMED GLASSES GREEN POSTAL SERVICE SHIRT

YOU… AT THE BAR SCENE GIRL HAIR BEER BELLY HORN RIMMED GLASSES

OUR EYES MET AND THEN I THREW UP ON YOU, VERY SORRY. LETS HANG OUT
AND SEE WHAT I HAVE THAT ENDS UP INSIDE OF YOU !!!!
   
    * Location: HILLIARD
    * it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 400960548

Re: SAW YOU AT MODEST MOUSE SHOW - m4w - 25

THAT’s MY GIRLFRIEND, ASSHOLE!

Re:Re: SAW YOU AT MODEST MOUSE SHOW - m4w - 25

NO
WAY DOOD THERESS NO WAY!!!!! IF SHE WAS YOUR GIRLFRIEND SHE WOULDNT
HAVE ALREADY RESPONDED TO THIS EMAIL!!! IM GOING TO HAVE 3 FINGERS

BURRIED THIS WEEK WHEN WE GO ON A DATE! HOMO

Walmart…Marysville - m4w - 33
Date: 2007-08-20, 11:20AM EDT

I had a “man’s meal” as you called it. You had a can of peaches that your mom(?) offered to pay for.

Just wanted to let you that you have a great tan and are extremely hot! I’d shop with you anytime!…LOL

Would love to hear from you sometime…
   
    * Location: Marysville
    * it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 401390980

Re: Walmart…Marysville - m4w - 33

That’s my girlfriend, asshole!

Re:Re: Walmart…Marysville - m4w - 33

LOL…You wish!!

Bon Vie: Friday - m4w
Reply to: pers-401697847@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-08-20, 4:31PM EDT

You: purple blouse, stunning…with son? Eating at Bon Vie in Easton Mall, Friday the 17th around 2PM.
Me:
tall, short hair, blue shirt, at a table facing yours…couldn’t take
my eyes off of you. can’t get you out of my mind…    

    * Location: Easton Mall
    * it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 401697847

Re: Bon Vie: Friday - m4w

That’s my girlfriend, asshole!

Re:Re: Bon Vie: Friday - m4w

LOL….well,
if indeed she is your girlfriend, congratulations on a great find.  
But I wonder why you’re trolling the CL forums if you have such a
beauty?   Best of luck with her.

Does anyone know LATTIE STRYKER? - m4w - 27
Date: 2007-08-21, 1:06PM EDT

She
has short brown hair, is quite busty and a little thicker. I had a
night of bliss with this woman and would like to do it again. She works
in construction, but I think her phone was turned off or the number was
changed. If anyone knows her or how to get a hold of her, please let me
know. I would appreciate it alot! Thanks alot fellow craigslisters!
   
    * Location: Columbus
    * it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 402385723

Re: Does anyone know LATTIE STRYKER? - m4w - 27

That’s my girlfriend, asshole!

Re:Re: Does anyone know LATTIE STRYKER? - m4w - 27

Are you serious? My bad, I was just someone who met her years ago and I lost touch with her. How is she doing?